I do not like the 1984 film CHILDREN OF THE CORN. I rarely speak of this dislike because I don’t think there are many people out there that actually like it. I can’t at all understand how someone could like the film but for some unknowable reason someone must because they have made at least six sequels over the years. Six! How the hell does CHILDREN OF THE CORN rate six freakin’ sequels? Of course, my reaction and enduring hate of COTC may be tainted by the circumstances around my first viewing. This was the first movie I convinced friends to go see in the theater that turned out to stink. I had a great record up until COTC but this bomb erased all the goodwill I had built up over years of smart choices. I actually apologized to everyone afterward for choosing a crappy movie and ruining the evening. High school was hell. Back when Stephen King was screaming bloody murder about how much he hated Kubrick’s version of THE SHINING I always thought he should have reserved his ire for crap like this. Kubrick made a good film that King disliked for not being his book but this thing just sucks out loud. King got the chance to make his own version of The Shining as a TV mini-series years later and proved that filming the book was a bad idea. A horror tale shouldn’t bore you to sleep, Mr. King. But in a few weeks there is going to be a TV remake of CHILDREN written by King. Since the original story was very short maybe the new version won’t be long and dull. We can hope. But I suspect that this is a story that should never have been filmed. Not all Stephen King is great and cinematically he is still more miss than hit.
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