Saturday, September 27, 2008
For years I stayed away from the sequels to HALLOWEEN. I did this because I love the original film and knew that the series had to deteriorate from that amazing high point. I finally watched HALLOWEEN 2 a while back and really enjoyed it. It’s a big step down from the first and has a few stupid moments but overall I liked the way it stayed with that fateful night and drew the story to a satisfying end. That is where the series should have stopped and clearly Carpenter and his collaborators agreed as the next film was a completely different (and generally loathed) attempt to change the subject. But Michael Meyers was fated by box office returns to rise again so they made three more sequels and I have subjected myself to them out of my sad need to see every damned horror film ever made.
So what have I learned from HALLOWEENs 4 through 6? I’ve learned that these asinine movies should never have been made! And I suspect I’m not alone in this opinion since when they lured Jamie Lee Curtis back to reprise her role in H2O they ignored these three misbegotten films. They are absolutely terrible one and all. I would say that they got worse with each one but all three are so bad that trying to graph their awfulness is an exercise in futility. Suffice to say they suck and are not worth your time. They lack every fine quality that made the first film good and are burdened with some of the dumbest ideas for stories I have ever seen. By the time in 5 that they introduce the wrist rune tattoo with its attendant ‘Curse of Thorn’ crap I knew they were so far off the rails that there was no way to recover.
Now for the real question-Are these three sequels as bad as Zombie’s remake of HALLOWEEN? No. Even as bad as these three awful wastes of 90 minutes are, they are less insulting than last year’s celluloid bowel movement masquerading as a movie.
The only good movie with HALLOWEEN in the title is the first one. The second is acceptable but quite flawed and 3 is a fun creepy tale that has nothing to do with the previous movies. Everything after that is not worth worrying with.
I’m still looking forward to watching a lot of scary movies in October. Just not these!